Kid Connections

Ministry in Three Dimensions

I'm currently reading Steve Crofts book "Ministry in Three Dimensions: Ordination and Leadership in the Local Church" and wondering why (when the denominations are facing such decline and are desperate for someone to help them regain some ground) folk can't just get with the programme when other tried and tested ideas clearly show where the issues lie and how best to overcome them????

I sat through a very bleak meeting the other evening listening to how church decline is having a huge impact on the financial stability of churches, with the effect that they simply cannot sustain the churches.  But many of the declining churches seem to operate with a 'maintenance' model of church, an inherited mode of being church which calls for clergy to have the primary responsibility for 'leading worship, the pastoral care of stable congregations, and teaching the faith to children and young people'.  This may have been a traditional model, which did work several decades ago, but in this fast paced, quick change, needs based, consumeristic society, the church must be able to break through and speak prophetically to the people caught up in the vortex that is life!  Maintenance models of church have value in that they serve the needs of the people attending the church, but our task and subsequent model of being church has always been and always will be mission shaped!  So the primary task of any minister must be the effective enabling and leadership of a congregation to remain mission focused, moving a church along a healthy path that helps the congregation grow in discipleship and impacting the world around them for Christ. 

So in his book, Croft clearly highlights the role of the minister today: that they are walking the walk themselves - 'showing committed discipleship as they communicate and collaborate with the community of faith they are leading, being strategic in how they lead others to fulfill the missionary task.  He/she must be self-aware, manage themselves, have maturity to handle authority well, be discerning and able to lead a community of faith'.  So why is it then when we look at so many churches (and I hear this constantly as I visit churches and teach them about contemporary methods of being and doing church) that they are still stuck in the 'this is how we've always done it' mentality!  No wonder there is church decline if the method doesn't allow us to connect with what's going on outside our church building.  We're to be outward focused, that's the bottom line, so we can't start from a 'What is it we need?' position when the obvious starting question is 'How do we reach those beyond the current faith community?'.   I totally believe that when we stay focused on the 'other' then we in turn have our own needs met.  It's about attitude of heart! 

Oooooh, it is frustrating looking on but difficult for those faced with decline and fixed patterns of church.  But it's unacceptable to say to new ministers - 'this is how we do it' or 'this is the tradition', when it clearly is now not working.  Let's release a new generation of ministers who are encouraged to be first and foremost effective leaders, with the primary task of taking the faith community forward as a missional community!  Lots to pray about.

Enough ranting and rambling... back to my day off!

Work and play

Another hectic week in our household as No. 1 daughter prepares to move in to student accommodation next to where she'll be studying (Glasgow Caledonian University) after just being home from the USA a week ago. 

I've been meeting with lots of people of late ... lead a seminar for Lochaber Presbytery up in the beautiful Fort William on Saturdayand and spoke at this lovely local church on Sunday evening.  Yesterday was full of planning meetings for both the launch of our new Sunday Morning 'Together' services, where the whole church family will spend their morning worshiping together, and for the Growing Leaders - Youth Edition course we launch on 7th Sept.  

I also managed to spend some time with one of our church mums and her beautiful baby daughter.  I love the way mums beam with contentment and seem as though parenthood is the easiest thing in the world.  But I was reminded of how exhausting and isolating those first weeks with a new baby are as I remembered those first months with our youngest after an emergency c-section.  I long for church to be a place that connects with people well - being a friend when someone is lonely or hurting, knowing when someone is absent and taking the time to find out how they are, communicating the deep love and compassion of Jesus in times of need.  We need to work hard at connecting well - particularly with those outwith our immediate groups of friends, pulling in those on the margins to truly feel that they belong.  

So after a long day yesterday I hung out with a number of women in our church and some of their friends at our 'St Silas Women' event - 'How do we do this God thing?'  It was a lovely evening and a chance to relax for a bit and connect with other women.  The title of the women's weekend away 22-25th Oct is 'Connect' so should be good!  I can't go for the whole weekend but hope to make it for some of the time.

This Saturday we have Fischy Music in concert at St Silas!  Can't wait!!  Doors open at 2.30pm and the concert is from 3-4.30pm, tickets £3.  Come and join the fun!

Staff stuff

Spent the day at the Leadership Summit in Kirkie Baptist today.  It was good - much wasn't knew but it was inspiring listening to the speakers.  Early start tomorrow to go up to Balmaha for our Vestry day away.  Another long jouney there and back but thankfully we have our fellowship group tomorrow night so I can look forward to a nice meal and some good banter after the drive back.

Ends and Beginnings

Ends ... As school holidays draw to an end (- won't say summer holidays as I think we moved from spring to autumn without the nice warm bit in the middle!?! -) I can't quite believe it's over!  We've not done very much as the weather has only allowed the kids to play in the garden or go to the park a few times.  Hubby had to work most of the holidays as he finished his job in preparation for new things.  But I'm having a few weeks off, spending time with the kids before they start back and spending some time with hubby once they are back!

Beginnings ... several new babies have been born to church families over the summer - how lovely ... and does it make me broody?!?  No 4 daughter begins nursery and although she's really psyched about the whole thing I'm a tad nervous.  It seems not that long ago that we had to leave No 3 daughter at the nursery door ... and they just feel too precious to leave in the care of others!!!  Will they who care for and educate our children love and respect them the way we do?  Will they affirm and nurture them in a way that builds confidence and self-esteem?  I don't know and I certainly don't have the opportunity to be with them checking up on how they are being treated every day ... so I'm wondering how the parents in our church feel about leaving their children in the care of volunteer children's workers during services on Sundays!  I'm concerned from what I see and read of in some churches, that parents are purposefully excluded from 'children's activities'!  So - good children's ministry on Sundays must:-

1. Facilitate parents and children - particularly creating space for parents of young children to be together, and if that means worshiping, learning and having fellowship together with other young children and parents then that's what should be on offer.  There's far too much of a divide when we think about how we do church on Sundays!
2. Offer children the opportunity to 'opt in' to children's activities rather than be forced to participate in something where their parents are not permitted!  Sometimes the practicalities of space in our church means that we can't accommodate all the children in one group with a parent too!  Not ideal but one of these things where by we need to see the practical situation as being a problem and not simply the model of what is being strived for.
3. Offer parents the opportunity to 'opt in' to activities with children if they want to.  How many of us have gone to visit another church or have gone searching for a new church and had to leave our children with people we didn't know in a place that's unfamiliar???  It seems to be accepted in church circles that we should just trust the folk who are in the children's areas.  This should be a good thing - since we expect our churches to have the highest standards of care as they serve with passion and compassion to the glory of God,  but I have to say I'm really uncomfortable with a model that says we do church by separating the children from their parents ... actually, do you know what?, it's absolutely NOT a biblical model and I'm pretty fed up settling for what has gone before us.

The church should be able to analyse, plan, organise, develop, deliver and evaluate how and why it 'does' what it does much faster than it does in reality - which is usually a very long time.  It should be able to take action at a rate that is reasonable, identifying and responding to need (both proactively as well as reactively!!!) and implementing change to address those needs rather than dragging it's heels and living with the 'it's how we've always done it' mentality!  Some churches think they are cutting edge if they sing lively songs, have nice comfy chairs and have lots of visual stuff in their services ... but are they actually meeting the spiritual and practical needs of the families who attend?  Please ... think about how you are helping families grow in faith together!   

Todd Bentley and Roy Fields

I've been watching Todd Bentley for 4 hours!  Several people have been commenting about him and what's happening in Lakeland, Florida.  It's awesome to watch so many people worshipping so freely in the Spirit and the worship leader, Roy Fields, is effortlessly anointed.  I wish I was there!

I met an old friend on Monday who was saying that her pastor has been over to Florida and was definitely affected by the powerful anointing of God. 

It's understandable that many may be sceptical and suspicious, particularly if they are not used to seeing God work in powerful ways.  However, we need to be expecting!  God is awesome and works in an awesome way today.  God's power was not just something we read of in ancient times ... it's for today, and it should be a normal part of Christian life.  The struggle between flesh and Spirit is very real.  It is easy for someone to think they are seeing with spiritual eyes when they are really still operating in the flesh, even when they love the Lord.  It takes much discipline and submitting to the Lord all that we are in order to train our spiritual antenna.

St Silas Weekend

Only 6 weeks to go to the church weekend away ... but I'm delighted that this weekend is here as I'm looking forward to putting my feet up and watching a good film tonight!  I've spent which seems like every day for the last wee while in mind-bending concentration to develop a programme that is as creative as possible to serve the needs of our children and young people at the church weekend and I've still got to finalise drafts, buy the rest of the resources and meet with the team so they can add their flare to the plans.

I really don't like the word 'programme' as it suggests a ridged format - and it's one thing I don't want as our priority is to minister to and serve the children in a way that meets their needs and hopefully help them to have fun in a place where they experience genuine Christian love, care and fellowship - and help them to minister too!  Perhaps we don't think very often about children ministering to one another or to adults but if we accept that children are part of the body then we need to accept that God is gifting and enabling them as full members of the body.  Serving is a key aspect of being a Christ follower so we need to encourage this and provide safe opportunities for children and young people to minister in.  It's exciting and challenging stuff!!

The children's and youth team are going to be busy and I'm so grateful to all who have volunteered to help (there are now many but we still need more!) and I'm praying they will be really blessed as they serve.  We're offering 3 sessions for 0-2s, 5 sessions for children and 5 sessions for young people - but at various times to help them get as much from the weekend as possible - as well as lots of activities and free time.  I'm hoping that we can facilitate something for everyone that expresses meaningful community and praying that people will be blessed, challenged and encouraged in seeing how God is at work in all ages of our church family.  This is one of the few opportunities we have to spend long periods of time together and I think it's going to be a powerful weekend.

We're almost fully booked so if you're not booked up I'd get in there quickly! 

Can you judge a book by it's cover?

I've decided to bite the bullet and buy a book I said I'd never buy because of its title.  The book is 'Making your children's ministry the best hour of every kid's week', written by Willow Creek's Promiseland Director Sue Millar.  I don't like the title because it implies that children's ministry IS only an hour a week and that conjures up all issues for me.  What about kids who never come to church?  Is church about IN GRABBING or OUTREACHING, whether for kids or anyone!?!  For me, titles like this promote poor ecclesiology - don't care if it's a kids book or not.

That said, I think the contents of the book will do justice to the wonderful thing that is our 'gathered' expression of church for children and young people.  I'll let you know ...

My pastor gave me a lovely book for Christmas that I'm eager to start too.  It is called 'Renovation of the Heart in Daily Practice', by Dallas Willard and Jan Johnson. This book has 61 short chapters that I'm going to read over 61 days beginning 21st Feb.  I tend to ponder and analyse as I read and this book needs to be 'received' in that way so it'll be a daily discipline.  Each day has a 'daily experiment' and the introduction says, "To receive a book is to explore what is being said and to let the author take you on the bicycle ride of your life.  You take in all the scenery and let yourself be challenged.  You respond to God about what you've read.  When you receive a book in this way instead of just using it, it adds to your life".  Fantastic!  Cant wait.

Thank God it's Monday ...

... is the name of a book by Mark Greene, the director of the London Institute for Contemporary Christianity. He previously worked in London and New York for a leading advertising agency before becoming lecturer and then vice-principal at the London Bible College (now London School of Theology).  He spearheads 'Imagine', a project aimed at recovering the central task of whole-life discipleship in our church communitiies, which is something that I am really passionate about.  This revised edition of his book is fun, fast and full of stories. It's a highly practical book looking at making the most of the time we spend at work. Examining our jobs, colleagues and bosses from God’s point of view. Expanding the ‘spiritual’ part of life from the weekend to the workplace and understanding that God is at work there through us, in us, and in those we work with. 

One reviewer says, Mark Greene provides a theology of work that is sadly lacking in many churches, pointing out that most people work with non-Christians and yet never see them as potential Christians. He also challenges the pressure put on those who are already over-worked to spend vast amounts of time outside work hours evangelizing when their real witness has to be with those with whom they spend so much time.

Amen.  We need to get with the programme I think!

Emerging Church?

I'm looking at what the whole ethos of 'emerging church' has to say about children so I thought I'd google 'emerging church and children'.  Low and behold the first link it came up with was International Christian College, with a link to the Monday evening classes (April-Jun 2008) on the themes Exploring Emerging Church with Peter Neilson - looking at 'Examples of how Church is reconfiguring for our times and why'; and The Heart of a Child with Vicki Shaver - looking at 'Nurturing Children's Spirituality through Family and Church.'  Both, I'm sure, will be excellent and will speak to the subject of children and emerging church.

The subject of emerging church seems to attract many voices of different opinion within the Evangelical world.  Those who criticise the emerging church movement believe the movement's embrace of a postmodernist philosophy leads emergents to such things as unorthodox theology, relativism and universalism.

Iain Mobsby, an Anglican priest, has published his MA research in a book called Emerging and Fresh Expressions of Church: How are they authentically Church and Anglican?, a title I presume because emerging church expressions are taking serious criticism from academics, and highly regarded Evangelicals and many alternative worship and emerging churches in the UK seem to be specifically connected to the Anglican Church.  He says the results of his research "indicated a number of things that are interesting regarding different sub groupings of fresh expressions relating to contextual theology, Trinitarian theology and new forms of mysticism," and highlights that most "emerging churches use Andrei Rublev's Trinity Icon to frame much of their thinking."  Well, anything that uses the Trinity as a hermeneutic or lens through which to better understand a true expression and practical outworking of Church is definitely a plus in my book!  Some useful websites on the subject are:

http://www.emergingchurch.info/
http://www.ekklesia.co.uk/cultureandreview/emerginandfresh
http://www.alternativeworship.org/definitions_awec.html
http://www.cmaresources.org/  specifically http://www.cmaresources.org/articles/What_Kids_Church.asp an article by Neil Cole on 'What about kids in organic church?' Part One: Integration is better than Segregation - yes I have to endorse what he says.  We have a lot to give thanks for with the instigation of the Sunday School movement but we need to understand the context and motivation behind it.  We seem, now in the 21st Century, to be somewhat stuck in a time warp and unable to easily reform.  Isn't a key lesson from the reformation that we must KEEP reforming?  Church isn't school!  We must move beyond the old Sunday School model where cognitive learning is the primary task to a model that truly seeks to nurture children's relationship with Jesus and looks to give children real ways to express their faith and know God more.

Useful books:

I Like Jesus But Not the Church: Following Jesus Without Following Organised Religion

Postmodern Children's Ministry

The Out of Bounds Church: Learning to Create a Community of Faith in a Culture of Change

So what about the voices against Emerging Church?    Critisism of the movement comes from esteemed scholars such as DA Carson and John Piper (so in knowing some of their thinking and theological handling on the role of women in the church, I am already suspicious as to how their theology meets the emerging church 'conversation'!) but keen to know their concerns.  Some comments refer to emerging church as fad-driven, straying from the gospel, and question its orthodoxy.  Brian McLaren is a leading voice in the emerging conversation and Carson has been particularly vocal in his criticism of McLaren's doctrinal views, saying "I have to say, as kindly but as forcefully as I can, that to my mind, if words mean anything, both McLaren and [Steve] Chalke have largely abandoned the gospel" (D.A. Carson, Becoming Conversant with the Emerging Church, (2005), p.186).  Steve Chalke took some pretty heavy criticism after writing his book The Lost Message of Jesus, but I do think his efforts to raise legitimate concerns about the dangers of unsophisticated atonement theory needs to be seriously engaged with. 

A must website to visit is ApologeticsIndex.  Point 8, Glossary of Emergent Terms for Those New to the Conversation provides some interesting reading!  I'm afraid I don't appreciate the satire even if it is an attempt to accurately portray views!! 

Conclusion: It seems muck slinging is becoming an acceptable method of dealing with other believers who don't fall into the same categories as we place ourselves.  Are we still all in the same body?  I sometimes don't know who the enemy is anymore.  Why do we resort to devilish tools when we're supposed to watch each others backs? 

The criticisms are more than serious - I'd say they are so strong actually that I don't think I could align my theological underpinning to the EC movement if allegations of rationale are as liberal as they are accused of, however, in practise, I totally support a more fluid and organic presence of the 'Church' in all areas of life (that's what the Church is isn't it?) and see the many flaws in traditional models of church.  Does that make me one of them?!? 

This is a useful article from Scot McKnight in Christianity Today, who says, "Emerging catches into one term the global reshaping of how to "do church" in postmodern culture".  I think there is a desire here to 'do' church in a way that really helps us 'be' the Church!  Whatever position we align ourselves with, we must seriously critique any model of church that is not mission focused at heart but this seems to be.  As gathered communities of believers we portray a particular expression of the worshipping community of faith.  BUT our 'being' Church IS NOT that gathered expression in isolation to our daily walk - with other believers and non-believers ... and, of course, GOD.  Our 'being' and 'doing' Church is who we are - the body of Christ - in our homes, in our streets, in our schools, in our workplaces, as we drive, as we frequent restaurants, super markets, etc, etc, etc ... If any expression of church is only what we can glam up and re-package as a post-modern Christian expression to lure in the crowds then count me out!  We are to be in the world but not of the world - we need to help the world understand reality and what is truly absolute, in knowing God and God's story.  We must be careful in how we use terms and labels or we will misunderstand one another and miss something of God at work in our world today!  Perhaps we (adults) should step aside for a while and let the kids lead?  We might just learn something... !

At the end of the year ...

In the business of the day, I have escaped for a while as hubby looks after the 3 young ones!  I'm looking forward to a long soak in the bath with lots of the Christmas gifts I received - bubble bath, bath spa, scented candles and lots of Turkish delight!  But I thought I might just reflect for a while on the year gone. 

It's been an odd year.  The arrival of our beautiful son was most definitely the highlight of the year yet the memories of a most unexpected surgical delivery marred the experience (after the boy turned, deciding that he would like to come out 'foot' first, which was only spotted by the midwife when I was at the stage of delivering him ... and that was only after what seemed to be 20 minutes of contractions and took the midwife by surprise - it was my 5th so I knew I'd deliver quickly but that was fast!!).  Delighting in our new bundle of joy reminded me of how precious our children are and also of those babies that never were for us, entrusted to the care of the Lord, so it was joy tinged with sadness too.  He is the most charming we boy and I am so amazed by him.  I was chatting to my friend about the love we have for our kids and she said it's not a case of spreading the love more, we actually have more love to give.  I think she speaks the words of a very wise woman!

Being on maternity leave has meant that all my time has been spent with the children, which has just been so special.  Life doesn't get much better than this ... I wish I was young enough to have another 5 but, alas, I suspect that I am probably at the 'use by date' stage of life and unfortunately time doesn't stand still!  It has also meant that I notice (and get extremely hacked off with) everything in the house that needs cleaned, mended, changed, decorated ... etc!  I hate a messy house and try to have it tidy enough for me to enjoy, as well as those who visit.  Hospitality is very important to me and I like the family and anyone who visits to feel very much at home.  After recovering from surgery I was able to do lots of cooking, which I enjoy, with lots of family meals most nights and Christmas has been a never-ending cooking season!  I have only myself to blame for all those extra calories so I will begin 2008 with the usual goal of loosing weight and getting fitter.  I think the whole family have been more conscious about having a healthy diet this year.  I had to watch my diet when I was pregnant to control pregnancy diabetes.  Investing in some new bikes and a double trail-buggy (for the young ones) in the summer was a good kick start to improving fitness too so I hope we will get lots of use out of them when the weather is better.

I've missed not using my brain as much this year and although I have done some writing (for a book I'm working on) I feel a bit brain dead.  My husband bought me 2 brain train games for the Nintendo DS for Christmas so I've been enjoying those.  We decided to get Sky TV after I had the baby as we knew I'd be a bit house bound for a bit and don't do idleness well!  However, I did become very comfortable being a 'couch potato' for a while, overindulging in the comedy and film channels, so perhaps a habit to kick as the new year begins.

Ministry wise - I'm looking forward to the launch of the new Children's Ministry Network at the first conference in Perth on the 26th January at Lethem St Mark's Church, and to the development of the network as a new resource and source of support for children's workers - much more support for workers is required and there are a number of denominations behind this new venture.  I have been reflecting too on models of ministry and what is, and isn't, working with today's children, particularly here in Scotland.  I suppose old habits die hard and although I am very aware of lots of effort that goes in to work with children in our churches I feel we are not serving our children or children's workers well by allowing investment (in time, money and effort) in poor practises and methods that are not well thought out.  Sometimes it's the blind leading the blind because no one will step up and help.  Leaders and workers burn out because they feel they need to dream up newer and better ideas for the most creative experiences that children can have.  Or they feel overwhelmed with the responsibility of not only teaching scripture but having to do it in a super cool or elaborate way.  We need to speak 'release' to those who feel burdened or isolated in their role before they burn out or bail out!!  The most important thing we can give children is ourselves!!!  Turning up with a pure heart and a desire to accept them as they are and to share of our relationship with the Lord is the most effective resource we will ever have.  That will never change!  We can only introduce someone to the person of Jesus at the level we know him ourselves.  Our relationship with Him should never come second to the 'work' we do for Him, for the work is only of any use when it pours from a selfless heart of worship in adoration for the Lord, as we try to be all that we can be for Him wherever He has called us.

Children are a blessing beyond words and God esteems them with great honour.  Please take time to pray for the children you know and those you don't know - particularly those who are experiencing hurt, fear, poverty and illness - intercede for them, those who minister to them and those who have the power to change their lives for the better. 

I give thanks for those who touch my live - my family and my friends whom I love and admire in so many ways.  I know I am truly blessed and I am so grateful for the amazing things the Lord has done for me. 

May you know God's richest blessings, joy and peace in the year to come, and the care and love of Him who gave Himself for us.

CMN (Scotland)

Publicity should be out in the next week for the first Children's Ministry Network (Scotland) conference!

The launch of this network will take place at Letham St Mark's Church in Perth on Saturday 26th January 2008 and I'm really excited about the possibilities that this new network will bring.  As a national, interdenominational Christian Network, it's mission is to resource and equip children's workers and churches in a safe and supportive forum.  Over the last decade particularly, Christian Youth ministry has developed considerably and there are many forums, resources and advice available to those in that field of work.  Christian children's workers/pastors/ministers, however, can feel more isolated and unsupported, particularly when the nature of their work is not really understood, so there will now be a body in Scotland trying to serve the needs of those workers.  This network hopes to improve collaboration and develop existing network links and it will offer support to paid and voluntary workers by encouraging discussion, sharing of experiences, ideas and best practice, as well as encouraging personal reflection and growth.

If you would like more information then please contact me or any of the core team, including:

Vicki Shaver at International Christian College vicki.shaver@icc.ac.uk
or
Linda Pollock at the Church of Scotland lpollock@cofscotland.org.uk